Mirror, Mirror

Now that I've run the marathon, I have one fitness goal I'd like to achieve. That's in addition to keeping running. I'd like to be able to do pull-ups and dips. At the gym, there's a weight assisted pull-up and dip machine. I'm fairly close but not close enough. I'm setting my birthday as my goal date. It seems reasonable.

This may require me to spend more time lifting weights, which can be depressing. Part of the reason for that is no matter how much I lift weights, no matter how much muscle I gain, it seems like no one ever notices. That's part of the reason for giving up on trying and finding another way to be in shape. It's still depressing though. Maybe my life would be simpler if I never looked in a mirror.

I was at a baseball game recently and an older woman was talking about her niece's boyfriend, a lifeguard and a bodybuilder. I know I'm nosy bu I would have rather not heard her anyway because it was one of those conversations that reminded me why it always seemed that no girl was ever interested in me. It reminded me of being in college and how every girl was interested in a football player or a guy twice my size.

I know this was long ago. I'm older now and that was long ago. I wish I could forget. Or have a better way of moving forward.

But, I suppose it's like that old Faulkner quote, "the past is never past."

Of course, it's part of the reason I like running. Extra weight slows you down. You can't always look at a person and tell who is fast. And there are straightforward concrete ways to improve on past performances.